#2: He would drop everything.

His bright smile lit up the room.

Again, he overlooks my expectations by dressing up in blue striped pajamas. He's God. His closet must be radical.

"Jack. I've been waiting for you."

What was I supposed to say? To the man responsible for creating the universe, the Earth, the very maker of my flesh and blood? The man responsible for parting the sea for those who used to deceive him? The man whose son has walked on water and revived the dead? You can't blame me. You just can't blame me for being speechless.

"Well? Have a sit. You seem surprised to see me." He smiles wide again.

OK, he has got to stop smiling like that. I'm not used to being intimidated. This just feels different. I know you've never met God, and boy, what they say in the Bible? That whole "fear of the Lord" thing? Now I get it. He makes me shiver without even trying.

"Is it the AC?"

"Huh?" He asks me, puzzled.

"I'm feeling a bit chilly."

He throws his head back--and laughs thunderously. "What AC? We don't need that here. You and the rest of my kids, all of you, you want to snuggle in your big beds, turn up the AC. Here the air simply moves. Feel that?" He begins dancing the hula.

Who knew? God, he dances.

"May I?" I ask awkwardly. He nods, and I take my seat.

"Jack Anthony Lawrence," he says. I begin to get used to being blinded by his smile. "Tell me. What brings you here?"

I knew this moment was coming. From the second I realized I wouldn't last any longer down there, I had been anticipating, no, dreading this moment. Where I had to confront the person I had been neglecting my whole life.

But he, he seemed serene, which was ironic to me. He knew about every little thing that went on in the universe. Chaos. War. Hatred. Disobedience. And yet he was calm. Unlike me, who fidgeted and twitched everytime something went wrong.

I take a deep breath and speak louder.

"He...he wanted to kill them...my family...I just had to kill him before he could hurt them...I...I...can't believe I did that, but I had to...it was a mistake...and...I just, I just had to..."

I bang my fist on the coffee table in front of me, spilling a glass of water placed on it. He doesn't blink.

"Jack. No one messes up too much for me. So if you think I'm gonna blow up in a rage, I'm not."

Again, the intimidating smile.

Somehow I feel compelled to tell everything to this man. I was glad I had died and ended up here. He seemed eager to listen to every little detail about my life. I just knew from the start that I could count on him.

"You don't know how hard it is, God. To just stand there, neck-deep in the...the realization that you're your family's last hope. I love them. I had to do that. He said he would cut off my son's head if I didn't give him the money...you can only imagine the agony...the pain!"

"Oh, I don't need to imagine it, Jack. I was right there with you."

"How...how could you let such a thing happen?" I cry, harsher than intended.

I just love to scrape the blame off myself so I can thrust it to someone else. And now I was blaming God.

He ignores my tone. There was no point in arguing. He would always have the upper hand.

"How would you like to come back to Earth with me, Jack?"

I am stunned. Well, of course. He can bring me back. The question is, why? And of all people why me? To this moment I do not understand how God manages to give all his attention to one person when the rest of the universe is in jeopardy.

"Would you like to come back to Earth with me?" he repeats, and I briskly nod my head, afraid that he would change his mind.

"I'm sure you miss Linda and the kids. So we'll pay a little visit, see how they're doing. That sound good to you?"

"I'd love to!"

"All right then. But there's a catch."

"I knew this was too good to be true," I say, and we both laugh.

"They won't be able to see you."

"Oh...I guess that's all right." I look down, almost scared to look at him after what he just said. Did he just say he'd personally take me? And drop everything he's doing here? He has got to be kidding.

"Tomorrow. First thing in the AM. You need some shut-eye. Now off you go. It's been a long day for you."

He stands up and leaves through the double doors.

When I hear them close, I look up and find myself already in another room. There's nothing else in here but a bed, a plasma TV, and a glass floor where I can see sheets of thin clouds covering the place I used to call home.

I fall asleep in a heartbeat.