abot-langit.

I saw stars...not the kind you saw sparkling idly by the moon. Apt evidence that I have had a long day. Clearly, there must have been a meeting in the heavens (rather, in hell) that all elements would join forces to ruin me. And they were successful. I was more than willing to just disappear--and exclude myself from the road everyone was taking. Possibly, it was not for me.

I retreat to the one place I have not been in years. Where innocence is not condemned and laughter is encouraged, not tolerated. Where falling flat on your face does not have to be a humiliation. Where your soul is free to dance.

The kid's playground.

To my dismay, I had visited at an ungodly hour, when children were home already in front of the TV. All had gone but one little boy.

He amused himself by going down the slide, stumbling, laughing at himself and then going down again. Never tiring of doing the same things over and over. The wind blew against my face, yet the boy had no fear, clutching volumes of sand in his hands. A few grains made their way into his eyes but there was no stopping him. He was determined to have his fun.

I couldn't help it. I had to know his name.

"What's his name?" I said loudly to myself, knowing that would get his attention.

The boy stopped in his tracks and smiled. "Ken-shin."

"Ken-shin with an N!" he continues, after I forget to reply.

From the top of my head I began to dig into his likes and dislikes. He likes mangoes and sizzling sisig. He's six years old, but hasn't been to school yet. Apparently he likes Taylor Swift.

Our conversation would switch from English to Tagalog, depending on what we were talking about. All he had to do was say "Okay, back to English," and we would switch from "us" to "tayo". I wanted to pick apart his brain and see if he had a bigger sense of humor than myself.

All of a sudden I thought of asking him who his crush was. I tapped him on the shoulder so he'd turn around and face me. "You have a crush?" I say, unable to stifle a smile.

Puzzled, he raised one small eyebrow. "Ate Chandra, what is a crush?"

Just then I realized that my insolence had corrupted a little boy. "Uhm...you'll know when you're 10. Okay? Don't ask about it."

"I want to know!"

"Okay, okay...well. It's when you like someone."

"But I like everybody. Does that make everybody my crush?"

I laugh. This boy will make it to the books. It was too hard to define--and I had to narrow my own vocabulary for his sake. "No, but it's when you like someone so much that you want to be with that person all the time. And even if she isn't perfect...you feel like she is."

"Ha? Okay. Basta, if I have a crush I will call you! And you tell me."

His innocence fascinated me. Looking into his eyes seemed surreal--he could learn so much more. As he wrote on the sand with his little finger, I crouched down next to him and drew a heart.

To my astonishment he started talking about his best friend. "4 years old siya, pero kasingtangkad ko lang. Ang liit ko kasi."

I saw myself in him. "Ako pinakamaliit sa class."

"Oh? Ako rin eh! May kilala kang kaibigan na kasingtangkad mo?"

"Madami. Pero may nakilala ka na bang mas matangkad sa iyo?"

"Wow!" He jumped. "Mas matangkad sa akin? Wala pa!"

"Ubod ng tangkad...like this." I reached my hand up one foot above me. And I knew exactly who I was talking about. To my own surprise I began rattling the tiniest details about you, more than enough to bore him. Even in the face of strangers I could not get away from you.

"Abot langit ba siya, Ate?"

"Oo. Abot langit sa puso ko."